This be what befalleth, Laurence!  This be what befalleth!

I am quoting, of course, from Two Gentlemen of Lebowski: A Most Excellent Comedie and Tragical Romance, that lost Shakespearean play recently unearthed by Adam Bertocci.  Sir Walter is admonishing young Laurence Sellers on what befalleth when thou firsk'st a stranger 'twixt the buttocks. And what befalleth, of course, is Sir Walter wrecks yon corvette. Never mind that the vessel in question is not captained by little Laurence.
Mashing up The Big Lebowski and Shakespeare (and doing it well) is beyond brilliant. Being able to do it without using even one f-bomb is an accomplishment worthy of the Bard. There's even helpful footnotes and woodcuts just like we all had in our Shakespeare books back in high school. The Dude becomes the Knave.  "I must protest; the Knave mindeth. This will not stand, this uncheck'd aggression..."
But in the end, the Knave abideth.
Here's a bonus minimalist poster for The Big Lebowski that captures the spirit quite nicely.