Neil Gaiman's so good, hey? Seems I'm always finding books of his I didn't even know he wrote in used bookstores. Last week I picked up a short story collection, possibly his first. Uh, what's it called? Don't recall off the top of my head and it's alla way upstairs . . . I got Michelle reading Fragile Things which is a more recent anthology, and we're both loving it. Not too long ago I bought a Batman comic he wrote, Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader? I find Batman comics kind of hard to read, because unlike the movies, in the comics there's like 70 years of history and continuity that you need to know (Robin is dead but Robin 2 is Nightwing and Robin 3 is in the future and she's a girl . . . )but this one was brilliant and accomplishes its purpose- which is to bring to an end both iconic Batman series- Detective Comics and Batman- with a story that would be 'true' now and in twenty years, or seventy. I didn't even know they canceled those titles (naturally they relaunched them with new numbering and all but still). Yeah. Check it out.
In other news, Pallas and I have been busy kicking ass all week. Well, we went on the big water slide a billion times at the rec center and found all our shopping list on our own and made supper all by ourselves (even if it sucked). I taught her to say "kick ass" so when we got home from kicking ass I told her to go tell mom. "Mommy, kickass! Kickass! Daddy Pallas kickass!" but Michelle thought she was saying Princess. Well, in Pallas' case, same thing.

For 12 years now, Neal Stephenson has been my favorite writer. But for some reason I don't think I've ever looked forward to reading one of his books. I first read The Diamond Age as a class requirement in university. I still remember being skeptical about the cover and blurb, but then everything about it completely drew me in- the nanotech, the Chinese setting, the neo-Victorians and even the way it was written with the Victorian chapter headings ("Bud is prosecuted; noteworthy features of the Confucian judicial system; he receives an invitation to take a long walk on a short pier"). I loved it and read it several times. Then a room-mate had Snow Crash and I read it, even though it didn't sound anywhere near as good as The Diamond Age. But of course it kicked ass, right from the first scene with the Deliverator.
Then Crytponomicon came out and I was a little worried that the emphasis on code-breaking would be a little uninteresting to me. And no science fictional elements at all! Even then-roomie gabrielle was convinced I should just give up on it after watching me work on it for a month. But it was great. Imagine my dismay when I found out his next project was going to be a gigantic three volume historical epic entitled The Baroque Cycle! But but . . . I want more nanotech!
So I bought the books, all three of them as they came out. And they sat there on my shelf for several years staring balefully down at me with their weighty historical fictionness. I read one of his earlier works instead- Zodiac. I was sure that book wasn't going to be very good but of course it was great. It even features a two umlaut fictional 80s hair metal band! So I finally decided to tackle The Baroque Cycle, if only to clear them off my pile of books I needed to read. And was there ever a more genius and hilarious and interesting book about calculus and economics ever written? The answer is no, my friends. No.
So you would think I'd have learned my lesson when Anathem came out. I sort of did- I asked for and received the book for Christmas last year. But the premise didn't totally excite me- I vaguely knew it was about monks who did math instead of theology and weren't allowed to have cellphones. On some other planet or something? It's a huge book so I wanted to leave it till I had some time- for example, this 28 day vacation I am currently on.
Well, you see where this is going. I read it this past week, and loved it times a million. It's a shame it didn't win the Hugo, even Neil Gaiman who won it thought so, but oh well.
I can't wait till his next book comes out! I might even read it without complaining.

In the last week we've watched more movies than in the first 6 months of Pallas' life. Since we only watched two movies in that time I guess it wasn't that hard to surpass.
Watchmen: I really liked it. Never read the graphic novel so I dunno how it compares. Michelle and I drove home from our friends' place doing our best Rorschach imitation. "Rorschach's Journal, October 12th 1985." Cough cough.
Slumdog Millionaire: I really liked it a lot. My brother-in-law told me what the last question was and I still got it wrong. At least the slumdog didn't.
Gran Torino: I really really liked it a lot. Clint Eastwood at nearly 80 is still way more badass than you or me.
Coraline: I loved this movie. Just beautiful and scary and creepy and funny. Pure Neil Gaiman, even though they changed the book somewhat. Not that much, really. Coraline was the first book I ever read aloud to Michelle, so we really wanted them to get this one right. Our expectations were a little low since there has been a long string of book-to-movie adaptations of books we love that have been terrible. Actually, not terrible, just boring. And really, isn't that worse? Golden Compass- boring. Spiderwick Chronicles- boring. A Series of Unfortunate Events was pretty bad, come to think of it, though the soundtrack is one of the best ever. Don't even get me started on most of the CG movies the past few years (Pixar excepted though I didn't like Cars at all). Most of them we shut off halfway through they were so unwatchable.
So why did Coraline succeed? And why did it fail at the box office? Coraline only made $75 million domestically, and another 40 internationally. So it recouped just a little under double its cost. Not too bad I guess. But Madagascar, a movie that was (to me) so terrible I couldn't even sit through it made a half billion dollars worldwide, not to mention its sequels and DVD sales. Sales ain't everything, of course, but they determine what kind of movies keep getting made. Banal and insanely profitable wins over whimsical and mildly profitable in the eyes of most Hollywood executives.
Thank god for Pixar and Tim Burton, who is doing his part as always- 9 is coming out in a couple of months and then Alice in Wonderland. Who knows, maybe he'll make a movie of The Graveyard Book.

Neil Gaiman was on Q this morning. The Coraline movie comes out tomorrow. Which means Michelle and I should be able to see it in a year or so. Oh well. Coraline was the first book I read to Michelle when we started dating. I remember going to Hawrelak Park and laying in the sun, reading about this brave little girl and her Other Mother.

Anyways, now that Michelle has to spend quite a chunk of time feeding Pallas, I started reading to her again. This time it's The Flying Troutmans by Miriam Toews. Good book, funny. Partly depressing too but I am sure Pallas won't pick up on that. When she gets a bit older I will start reading to her for sure. Good books with just the right amount of subversiveness, like Coraline and anything by Roald Dahl.

I'm reading Neil Gaiman's Fragile Things. Obviously it's fantastic. I love short stories. It's been a while since I read some, and even longer since I wrote one. But here's the first part of a story I wrote under Gaiminspiration. It's kind of a true story, I just fictionalized the particulars a bit.

It was his retirement tour. If he was honest with himself, it was his second retirement tour. The first time it was after he got married. No married man should be out hitch-hiking around, he told himself at the time. So just this one more trip. And a few years later when she told him she was pregnant, and after the euphoria settled down, he decided he should hit the road one more time before the baby came and he had to become responsible.
He grabbed his sleeping bag and hiking boots and quick! out the door. He left a note for his wife telling her how much he loved her and that he would be back in a few days. Most other wives would have been angry and she was no different but she would forgive him. She knew when she married him he was a wanderer. And so long as he wandered highways and not beds she could live with it, even if she worried.
He never worried, not really. Sometimes he got into peculiar situations, even times he might call Crazy Fucked Up Shit, but he always found his way home. And anyways he had a way with people. He could build a rapport without even trying. Most times he didn't try, actually, and his rides would open right up to him. He was a story sponge. He never told stories, he just absorbed them from the people who gave him rides. You're a good listener they would always say. Thanks for the ride he would say.
It took a couple of hours to get out of the city- it always did. He hated that part but it had to be done. Once out on the highway though it was better. Even when it took hours to get a ride it was better. He could think. This time he had a lot to think about. Being a dad. Talk about Crazy Fucked Up Shit. His thumb was out but he didn't really look at the passing cars. Someone would pull over eventually. Maybe sooner, maybe later.
This time it was sooner. He almost didn't notice, actually, all lost in thought. It was an 18 wheeler. Usually the big rigs didn't stop. Too dangerous. Against the rules. Insurance costs too much. You know. He had to approach casually, in case the driver had pulled over to check a map or something and hadn't meant to pick him up. But the driver waved him to hurry so he climbed in.
Middle-aged white guy, hair going grey. Thin. They greeted each other. Then from the sleeper he noticed two kids. Brothers, probably, though they were not both the same color. The younger one was metis, by the look of him. The driver asked where he was headed. Prince Rupert I think, he said. Maybe the Charlottes.
I can get you to Jasper at least.
Cool. Thanks.
Name's John. These are my sons. Matt. Luke.
He thinks to himself, Matthew Luke and John. Who's missing? Mark. But he says, pleased to meet you.
The boys are shy at first but their rambunctiousness wins out eventually. They are on an adventure with their dad, and strange hitch-hikers just add to the fun. They ask him all kinds of questions, and he answers them till their dad tells them to leave him alone. Luke, or maybe Matt, though, gets in one more before they comply. Do you have any kids?
Not yet. Wife's expecting, though.
John beams. No kidding? Congratulations man! Kids are the best thing ever happened to me.
Jasper is four hours away, and they spend the time telling jokes. The kids in the back love knock knock jokes. He tells them his favorite.
Knock knock.
Who's there? they both shout.
Bearp
Bearp who?
You just said bear poo!
They laugh, and then they discover the plenitude of permutations of this single joke, each more hilarious than the last. Cowp! Dogp! Giant Squidp! Gorillap! Tyrannosaurus Rexp!
John buys them all lunch in Edson. While the kids eat their burgers and giggle, John asks about the baby. When it's due. If he's excited. Scared yet?
Soon John starts talking about his own kids. He says being a trucker's hard on a marriage. So he takes the kids when he can. The wife doesn't ever come though. But at least he's still married.
Later, in Jasper, when John drops him off so he can turn south on the 95, he jumps out of the truck there on the side of the road. The kids are sleeping.
It was nice meeting you, man.
You too. Thanks for the ride.
Listen.
Yeah.
When your baby comes. You love that baby. Take care of him. Her. Whatever. They're the most precious gift god will ever give you.
I will. For sure.
Maybe you noticed Luke and Matt aren't full brothers.
No I never noticed.
Well, they aren't. Luke is my son. One time I came home early from a two week haul. There was a strange car in the driveway. Well, you know the story. But you know what? I believe in the bible and I forgave her. Matthew is my son and I love him. I'm a lucky man. I really am. And so are you.
John held out his hand and he shook it. John got back in his truck and drove away.
He stuck his thumb out.

Did you hear they're making a Coraline movie? Teri Hatcher will voice Coraline's mother and other mother, and Coraline will be voiced by Dakota Fanning. I hope they stick to the Dave McKean visual style. Coraline was the first book Michelle and I ever read aloud to each other.
Neil Gaiman, of course, has written many fine children's books and has been blogging for a long time- he just met Sherman Alexie. That's cool, I like Alexie's stuff. Actually I have a short story anthology with both of them in it.

Yesterday in the Droppings (where you can add your feedback) people were talking about kids books, sort of. Actually, just Everyone Poops, which I am ashamed to say I have never read- what's wrong with me? Reading it should be in the Homie Bear job requirement, eh? Anyways, what's your favorite kid's book? I am partial to Dr. Seuss, of course, as I'm sure you all are. O The Places You'll Go is so good (hey Diney whatever happened to your copy?), Yertle the Turtle, Horton, the Grinch, you name it, Seuss is the best. But what else is out there? Anyone know of any newer stuff that I wouldn't really be exposed to, being childless and all? I have quite a few children's books in my library- I love the artwork, and often the rhymes are pretty great too, or else just the simplicity of the story. And the humour. Heck, it's all good.
Neil Gaiman recently put out a children's book called Coraline, which I would be interested in reading- I think it is quite dark from what I've heard, like much of children's literature throughout history. Think Brothers Grimm and wolves and witches.
Oh yeah, and someone wrote a pretty funny Matrix poem, Seussian style, over at Matrix Essays.