We went and saw John Carter last night, and while I was a little disappointed, I don't think it deserves the fate it was handed as one of the biggest flops (in the financial sense) in history. Going in, I wanted to feel that director Andrew Stanton would clearly be the victim of studio honchos who felt that calling a movie "John Carter" rather than "John Carter of Mars" or "A Princess of Mars" was a wise marketing decision. Someone on my Twitter feed said that'd be like renaming Raiders of the Lost Ark "Henry Jones". Anyways. The movie had three separate beginnings, never a good sign and not one that helps vindicate the director, and was that Michael Chabon I saw sharing the screenwriting credits? And having just watched 4 seasons of The Wire it was a little jarring seeing Officer McNulty being, uh, whoever Officer McNulty was trying to be. Though it was fun seeing Julius Caesar and Marc Antony reunited- not to mention Posca! I do want to say that the Tharks were pretty much Tars-tastic. And they were pleasantly faithful to the source material, as pulpy and muddled as it was, so really, I guess I should just be thankful they didn't cast Rosie O'Donnell as an adorably spunky sidekick to Tarzan. I mean, John Carter. Speaking of flops, I just read Nathan Rabin's My Year of Flops. As well as his memoir, The Big Rewind. My Pop Culture Happy Hour podcast pals are all friends with him and always borrow (ie steal) his ideas. So I thought I'd go to the source and read his actual books. Who would have guessed that the guy who came up with the term Manic Pixie Dream Girl led such a shitty life? Not shitty in the filled-with-terror-but-also-crazy-adventure way that Jeannette Walls describes in The Glass Castle. Just shitty in that he was so very angry and had no one on his side and thus wound up in mental hospitals and group homes. The sad thing to me is that not even Nathan is on Nathan's side, or it seemed to me anyways after I finished the book and couldn't really think of a single redeeming thing to say about him- not because there are none, but because Rabin himself seems to have gone out of his way to avoid pointing any out. Here's another flop, starring me! Someone took this video at work. The star was supposed to be the truck driver, who is a new trainee and also the brother of the guy taking the video. You know, take a video of the kid brother at his new job to show grandma kinda thing. I guess this would be an outtake.

One of my favorite science fiction stories ever is a little gem written in the 1930s called "A Martian Odyssey" by Stanley G. Weinbaum. Imagine my excitement when I was checking deviantArt and one of the artists I watch, George Sellas, was hired to illustrate a comic book adaptation of it. It finally came in the mail the other day and it's great! Beautiful art, very faithful to the story with only minor cuts for length. Also, as you can see from the cover, there's a War of the Worlds adaptation and a few other stories. You can get it here.
Speaking of great SF short stories, I love the Year's Best series edited by David G. Hartwell and Kathryn Cramer. I'm reading Year's Best Sf 14 right now, covering 2008 I believe. Fantastic. Every one I've read is amazing, though #10 for whatever reason was perhaps a little weaker than the rest. Short stories might not be the most popular form but in the science fiction field at least, they are as strong as ever. Kage Baker, who died this morning, had a story or two included along the way.
Also strong as ever is Empire Strikes Back. Check out this guy's Lego diorama, complete with LEDs and winch motors. And Avanaut's Lego on Hoth photo set is beautiful. Especially this one.

Remember when Krusty the Clown unveiled Poochy to his television viewers? He was wearing a tux and he gave the following address:
“Once in a great while we are privileged to experience a television event so extraordinary, it becomes part of our shared heritage. 1969: Man walks on the moon. 1971: Man walks on the moon, again. Then for a long time, nothing happened. Until tonight.”
Although he was talking about the history of television, I often think he was also kind of talking about the history of space exploration. In recent years, of course, lots has been happening. Nearly all of it done by NASA. Until tonight. Well, not exactly tonight. But still, Canada is getting in on the space race- we're sending a mission to Mars in 2009! The mission is called Northern Light, and it's mostly a partnership between universities and corporations- no government involvement. And the total budget is around $20 million. In terms of space exploration it's practically free.
What is free is Google Sky, the new universe portion of Earth. Earth and Sky, get it? 100 million stars! Wow. You can read about it here or just go download it from Google, I'm sure you know the way.
Speaking of exploration, NG has some pretty cool photos of a recent excursion to the Mid-Atlantic Ridge. Glass squids with polka-dot eyes!
All these robot explorers remind me of another Simpsons quote- when Bart and Lisa graduate from military school the principal or general or whoever runs it says in his commencement speech, "The wars of the future will not be fought on the battlefield or at sea. They will be fought in space, or possibly on top of a very tall mountain. In either case, most of the actual fighting will be done by small robots. And as you go forth today remember always your duty is clear: To build and maintain those robots."

Did you know that Mars has a naturally occurring laser? Yeah, it's kind of crazy, but true. The details are pretty technical, which is another way of saying I don't understand it myself. It has to do with photons and protons. Next time someone is boring you to death with personal details about their financial debt load, just say, "Yeah, but on Mars there's a natural laser. I'm working on developing one for myself."
And if you want to experience Mars-like conditions for the next year and a half, just volunteer with the European Space Agency and they can hook you up.
Personally, I am more interested in experiencing QueenCharlotteIslands-like conditions later this summer when Michelle and I go on holidays.

As you've probably heard, the first privately funded spacecraft made it into space today. This is good news for people such as Lance Bass- it gives them one more potential avenue for getting to Mars. Did you know that if Lance were to go to Mars, he would produce roughly a ton of poo? It's true, assuming a trip of 2 years. That's a lot of poo, even if it is catchy, repetitive, appealing-to-the-general-public poo. What to do with all that poo? Don't forget that Lance is likely to have some co-astronauts, who will produce a similar amount of poo, though I think theirs would be less prone to 5-point harmony.
One elegant solution is to harness the intrinsic power of poo (what have I been telling you all this time?), recycling it for drinking water, food, and even, possibly, fuel. There is a bacteria called Geobacter that can pull the double duty of breaking down organic matter and generating electricity.
Read more here.