The Canadian Finals Rodeo is in town for its annual eviction of the Oilers from Rexall. You know what that means right? It means you should go watch KoRn's rodeo-themed video for Hold On.
And look- Ursula Vernon's children's book Nurk is almost out! Why don't you buy me a copy?


Did you ever wonder what you would look like if you had antlers, walrus tusks, crab arms, elephant legs and polar bear ears? Wonder no more!



Scientists have discovered a solar system with at least five planets! That's cool, though I think the opening sentence of the article could have been written better: Star 55 Cancri became the only star aside from the sun to have five planets . . . I'm pretty sure there are plenty of stars out there with five or more planets. And I like the part where it says the new planet is full of gas. Me too! Ah well, I pick at nits here. The important thing is that 55 Cancrians will soon be sending their gaseous space spoors to conquer Earth!

Yay for stuff!
I went to the library to pick up a Kenneth Oppel book- Airborn, and I also found a Beck CD, Guerolito, which is a remix album for Guero. Guero is one of my top ten all time CDs. Sweet! How I missed Guerolito when it first came out I don't know but whatever.
Also I had an Amazon order come in- Mouse Guard and Otis Frampton's Oddly Normal graphic novels. Sweeet!
And although I still haven't obtained any trilobite fossils I am just as happy with my new tree frog magnets. Sweeeet!



I just finished reading a book called The Looking Glass Wars, by Frank Beddor. The back cover reads "You think you know the true story of Alice in Wonderland? Well think again." It's one of those books that takes an established story and retells or reimagines it. The trouble is, rather than treating the source material with the respect it deserves, he poos all over it in the first few pages. Alice, or rather, Alyss, sees a copy of what Beddor calls 'Alice's Adventures Underground' and calls it a "stupid, nonsensical book". To me that's not cool. Why not just make up your own story in that case? He already changed Alice's name to Alyss. He made the Mad Hatter into a paramilitary Wolverine-type named Hatter Madigan whose top hat is actually a dervish of blades. The White Rabbit gets replaced by an albino tutor with extra sensitive Wolverinish ears named Bibwit Harte. The Cheshire Cat is now an assassin named The Cat who possesses the Woverine-like ability to regenerate- nine lives, of course. Anyways, the book wasn't terrible, though I've read better for sure, and it will appeal to boys- I think Michelle's grade 7s would like it. I just think if you're going to borrow from the classics you shouldn't show such contempt for them.
Oh well, here's another picture of my sweeeeet frog magnets:

These are the things that I am excited/learning about this week:
-Snmashing my car oh wait that's not one.
-the loonie hits parity with the US$. Now if only we could actually pay less for American goods. And I know it's a mixed blessing with our exports- I work for an exporting company after all.
-lobsters. Seriously, they're just so cool. But contrary to what I've heard, they don't actually mate for life. In fact the closest human analogy would be to wife beaters. Only, polygamous wife beaters. Anyways, you can learn more from Trevor Corson's Secret Life of Lobsters.
-Steve Biko. I've always loved that Peter Gabriel song, Biko, though I had no idea what he was saying. What's a biko? Turns out Biko is an anti-apartheid martyr who was killed thirty years ago this month. Maybe you've seen the biopic starring Denzel- Cry Freedom.
-Sébastien Chabal. I'm not much into rugby (though I'll cheer the All-Blacks when the chance arises, like that time in Waitomo drinking Tui beer) but when i saw this deviation portrait of a French Rugby player, I wanted to know more about him. Turns out he's a monster. An All-Black-crushing bipedal bulldozer.

First of all, do yourself a favour and immediately go get Loreena McKennit's Nights from the Alhambra concert DVD/CD. It's beautiful- I'm almost in tears from it. Seriously.
Michelle and I have tickets to her concert later this month- at the Jube, not exactly as pretty as the Palace of Charles V but that's okay. Anywhere she sings is automatically heaven.
Would you think you were in hell if you saw a bunch of chupacabras running around sucking blood from chickens and cows? That's what they're saying in Texas- and one woman even has a severed head to prove it. Though to me the head looks kind of like a pitbull/bullshit cross.
Also in Texas, you might have heard about the social spiders who cooperated to spin a massive web. I never knew some species of spiders exhibited social behaviour- in fact, I thought it was an invention of Vernor Vinge in his excellent book, Marooned in Realtime- he has massive colonies of social spiders who live atop jungle canopies, harvesting silkworms and pooing green mycotoxins. The spiders actually are just an interesting detail- the book itself is a sci-fi murder mystery. Vinge just won a Hugo or his latest book, Rainbow's End.

As of 7AM this morning I'm on holidays for the next twelve days! That's the coolest thing ever. Here are some things that are tied for second coolest thing ever:
1. Little red panda cubs born at the Valley Zoo. Help me cheer on my little cousins as they struggle to survive their first few months.
2. Many dinosaur fossils just down the road a ways from my place. (The actual location is secret to protect the site.)
3. Tomorrow I'm running my first race! Happy Canada Day Race. Yay for me! Join me in cheering me on! And Michelle too but she is an old pro at races and our little 5 KM race is just a cakerun for her. In fact she was the 5 K run clinic leader for the past few months.
4. This: and this: arrived in the mail for me this week from my internet pal Travis Hanson, the most excellent illustrator and print-maker. It joins the other print I already have and never ever tire of looking at. You can order your own prints or his books if you like over here.
5. Monday is our second anniversary. Yay for me and Michelle!
6. Bears. Or maybe they should be the coolest thing ever and everything else can be tied for third.

Some of the things that are exciting to me this week:
-new White Stripes! Too bad I couldn't get tickets to the show, but if you have some you don't want just let me know. I'm even willing to go to the Whitehorse, Yellowknife or Iqaluit shows.
-new purple froggy! Well, they call it a toad but it looks like a species of poison dart frog to me. Too bad Michelle won't let me get one, but if you have one you need to get rid of, just let me know.
-new black running hat. So I don't overheat while running. My wife didn't just let me get it, she bought it for me! yay! On Canada Day I will be running my first race, just a little 5 k one. But I'm excited.
How about you- what are you excited about these days?
PS- turns out Ashley MacIsaac and Jack White are distantly related so Ashley will open for the White Stripes for at least the Eastern leg of their Canadian tour (Which I will also accept tickets for).

Snails n' Spiders n' Stuff
I'm reading The Boilerplate Rhino, by David Quammen, which is a collection of columns he did for Outside Magazine over the years. It's full of fascinating facts about the natural world. I never knew that a male snail's reproductive organ is a long, flexible tube extending from its head! Try not to think about that as you watch this almost criminally cute and hilarious Flash cartoon called David's New Snail.
Spiders also have strange reproductive organs, but spiders are just too gross to talk about. Spider-Man is not gross, though, and the trailer for Spidey 3 is out! Venomlicious!
If you happened to pick up the National Post today, you will have seen the article that pits Superman against Spider-man and Batman and Wonder Woman. It was illustrated by Andrew Barr, who was kind enough to post the illos on his blog. You'll be happy to know, Selkie, that Wonder Woman comes out ahead in the aricle, though it seems to be by virtue of her sex appeal. Which is admittedly much higher than a snail's.

Here's a trustworthy saying: "An hour spent in the dark, listening to Beethoven, is an hour well spent." See? I didn't even make it about bears, or the most beloved of ursine composers, Bearthooven. Just simple, straightforward advice that you could all follow. I suppose I could add a "poo" in there for good measure, but I think I'll leave it. (In truth I can't take credit for this revelation, as it was gabrielle's idea to shut off all the lights and sit quietly listening to Ludwig.) Too few people take advantage of an opportunity to contemplate and reflect. It's a discipline and an art, really.
Here are some of the insights I arrived at today (you should listen to the Pastorale while reading these):
1. Medusa is pretty creepy with her snakey hair but I would be way more scared of a Gorgon with spiders for hands.
2. I think China discovered the Americas and its indigenous peoples before even the Vikings did. This theory is not unique to me, but as far as I know it has never been confirmed. There are tantalizing and intriguing not-quite-clues that you find every now and then in the literature, however. I have this book that is a collection of readings about China and there was a statement that caught my interest, from Liang Qi Qao, written in 1900. He almost seems to be quoting an accepted truism, like "30 days has September . . . " when he says, "Of old, there were five States: China, India, Persia, Egypt and Mexico." The great Mayan and Aztec empires were not contemporary with the zenith of the Persian and Egyptian dynasties, so perhaps they knew the Olmecs or another race? The Chinese historically were never all that interested in the other countries of the world, so they may have known all about them and never bothered to write one single thing about them. Or perhaps we just haven't discovered anything yet. Although Admiral Zheng He's mighty fleet of 300 ships sailed the world between 1405 and 1433, so it is conceivable they met some Aztecs. And look at what I just found as I was researching a little on Zheng He- Nicholas D. Kristof writes "historians have found evidence that when China's Shang Dynasty was overthrown in about 1045 B.C., Chinese refugees may have sailed to the Americas and settled among the Olmec people of Mexico . . ." (from Thunder from the East, by Kristof and WuDunn). Interesting, eh?
3. I don't understand why Isaac Asimov's Nightfall is considered one of the most important sci-fi stories of all time. It's kind of boring. I guess it was innovative and all, dealing with social issues rather than just being pulp fiction, so it is respected for that, but if you want a kickass story about a planet with three suns that only gets darkness once every 22 years, you should really watch Pitch Black.