Wow, here's something I started back in July of 2004 and completley forgot all about. I don't really know where I was going with it, though it likely was anticipating gabrielle's and my trip. Anyways, I found it in my drafts archive and I just finished it off in a few minutes for something to do, taking it in a completely different direction, I guess. No real clever wordplay that I like to think is my forte. Just a quick bit of silliness. 

Homie and the Sea Turtle

 Homie Bear in polar mode 

 Decided to see the antipode 

 He went to where the icebergs flowed 

 Caught a current and off he goed 

 He promised a postcard to the coastguard 

 Waved byebye to his whale friend Blubbalard

And settled back to enjoy the trip 

 But he was intercepted by a pirate ship 

 They wanted swag and booty and gold 

 But all Homie had was ice and cold 

 So they went away but first they say 

"Watch out for sharks when you get to the bay" 

Homie said, "Sharks! That sounds pretty cool!" 

He decided to see them, like a big fool 

He went to Shark Island and clambered ashore 

He didn't see sharks, they don't live there no more 

But he saw a green turtle, laying eggs in the sand 

And got her some water, to help lend a hand 

The turtle said "Thanks, my name is Ferg 

"And I can't help but notice that your little iceberg 

"Is melting too fast in the tropical heat 

"You're sweating so much you smell like old sheet 

"So hop on my shell and I'll take you home 

"I've always wanted to see where polar bears roam" 

So Homie said sure and he went back to the Arctic 

Leaving his iceberg right there where he parked it 

And Ferg liked it so much in the great white old north 

That she became a polar turtle from that time henceforth 

Which is why when you time travel a million years from last week 

You see white sea turtles with white shells and white beaks! 

 There. Hope you like it. I better go make supper for Michelle. Speaking of my beautiful wife, tomorrow is her birthday, so please all send her some love! And maybe for a gift you can suggest a nice romantic song (but not dumb, okay?) and I can make the compilation!