11 years. Figure I should post something. Here's a photo:

Next week I get to go to Volbeat! Woohoo!  I only just discovered these guys about a month ago but have become completely addicted to their Metallica/Slayer/Ramones/Johnny Cash/Elvis/rockabilly Danish sound. Here:






Pallas has also recently taken up writing songs about devils:

Two blog posts in an hour! New world record. This one was kind of a case of spontaneous poetry since a twitter friend (@Rudy_Trev) was raging against the dying of the light and his homework, or so I assume. He has to write a villanelle. "I'm good at poems!" says I. But then I started thinking. I wonder what it is a villanelle.  Turns out it is a ridiculously complicated poem of 19 lines and this line has to be that line and that line repeats over here and suchlike.
Well, this might not be technically correct but I wrote it in eight minutes so:

O Wolverine
why did you forget
your shirt?
I always liked your
yellow blue costume
O Wolverine
Is it because you can't be hurt
that you don't sweat about
your shirt?
You are pretty mean
and definitely kind of lean
O Wolverine
Was it Sabertooth
who ripped
your shirt?
So good night and carpe diem
Wolvie Logan-san son
Adamantium 'em all
and let god sort 'em out

I wasn't the best father ever yesterday. Just kind of lost it on Naia. Sure, she was being completely stubborn and unreasonable, but I'm the adult and I sometimes need to remind myself to act like one. The situation was really no different than a hundred before it. In the parking lot, where there is tons of construction. Sidewalks all closed so we are on the car surface. The rule in this instance is all little girls hold Daddy's hand. But since i only had one hand free (the other had groceries) I told Naia to hold Pallas's hand. She did not comply. Even when I switched it up so Naia was in the middle, she still wasn't gonna cooperate. Screaming and crying. And you should have heard Naia. Anyways I yelled at her in the car. Like, really yelled. She stopped crying but then sort of did this traumatized whimpering the whole way home. And did I mention that I went into Booster Juice and got myself a shake but didn't get one for Pallas, who was the one who asked that we go there? Oops. Pallas was very sad and her feelings were hurt too. Anyways, cuddles and Avatar Aang made things all better.

I just bring that up because today was much better, on everyone's behalf. They were very "hāve" (I tell them to behave when we go somewhere and Pallas says "were we being have?") even though we had to spend two hours at a clinic. Some of the highlights from today:
Pallas: Naia, you're funny!
Naia: NO I'm not funny.
Pallas: What are you then?
Naia: I'm . . . . . . . BIG funny!

And then later I was tucking Pallas in and she said "my room is the safest place in the whole world because you and mom won't let any bad guys or monsters in."
"That's right, sweetheart."
"You're my favourite BoogerButtBrain."
"Oh. Well you're MY favourite BoogerButtBrain! Goodnight princess!"

 Pallas also went and got all her dance class stuff today. I teared up a bit but she made me so proud:

 

I don't think Wolverine and the Hulk have had a good scrap in a while. I was the perfect age for the classic issue written by Peter David and pencilled by Todd McFarlane where Wolvie and Hulk (in his grey smart incarnation) fightfightfight. Pretty much a perfect comic book fight. Anyways.

Pallas got her ears pierced yesterday. When she was born my mom wanted to take her out of her little NICU incubator to pierce her ears but I thought it would be better if we waited until she was old enough to ask for it. Just kidding about the incubator. Sort of.
She's definitely expressed an interest before, she loves jewellery and fancy stuff. So I told her when she first asked that she definitely could if she wanted, just that she needed to be aware it hurt a little bit for a little while. Not that much and not for very long, but I wanted to be honest. So upon further reflection, she decided to wait. NOw that she's 4 1/2, and a big girl, she decided that short term pain was worth the long term gain.
So we gathered up her PoohBear blankie and her Pink Guy and went to Atomic Zombie downtown since they were recommended to us as a place where they take care of children, since not very many places do (outside of Mexico, where my Mom is from). They were great. I went in with Pallas and held her hand, and she was amazing. She kicked ass. She did the gasp of pain, and I could tell the tears were coming but she was determined to not let them win. It was so cute and so awesome to watch. We were half-convinced that she would bail after one, but she soldiered on and did the second right away. Same thing, initial gasp of pain, some half-sobs and then.... SHE DID IT! The pride on her face and the "ascitement" of finally having real ear-rings, well, these are the memories a dad treasures for all time. Afterwards she kind of did a dance with Michelle and announced to the heavens and anyone else in earshot "I got my ears pierced!!! I'm a big girl!!!"
Poor little Naia said, "My turn!" only it was not her turn.  Soon enough, Peanut! Don't grow up too soon.

Remember the halcyon days of the Woodsy Crypt? It was a simpler era of mostly we just watched movies and tv shows chosen by the VampireNomad. There were a few simple criteria for these programs. They needed to star either Gina Gershon, Craig Parker or Tom Hardy. Back in those days Tom Hardy was mostly known for playing the Romulan clone of Jean-Luc Picard or something, Shinzon, in Star Trek Nemesis. I'm hazy on the details and my PS2 from those days had a lot of trouble playing Nemesis, no matter how many copies I brought home from the video store where I worked. (Which is now a dollar store in the shopping centre closest to my house, weird.)
I'm losing my point in the nostalgic musings. My point is simple: back then I didn't really get why Tom Hardy should be singled out for such adulation. I gamely went along with her, but I didn't see it myself. HIs other claim to fame back then was he briefly appeared, naked and scrambling for his clothes, in a late episode of Band of Brothers. Like, episode 9 of 10. Again, didn't really see the appeal.
When the first pictures of Bane showed up I was like, "Hey that huge-ass dude has the same name as the guy my old room-mate was into way back when. That skinny naked guy from Band of Brothers. Whatever happened to that guy anyways?"
The answer is he got awesome. He got so awesome that he defined new realms of awesome such that the word awesome itself is obsolete.
Michelle and I watched Warrior last week. What a great movie. You should watch it. Oh you've seen it already? Watch it again! After it was over I told Michelle that I had a lot of work to do the next day. She was like, why, it's Canada Day it's a holiday. And I was like, the tomhardification of Nathan must begin anew!
You know, because I work out. Inspirational and all that.
Tweeted that and the VampireNomad was like, squeeee! A new term was coined. She even came up with units with which to measure tomhardification. Banes! And since I am but a wee mere mortal, I quickly realized that I could only measure myself in milliBanes.
We can only strive to reach one Bane.

Two and a half months, my longest hiatus from this blog in the nearly 11 years of its existence. This is merely a post to explain that I haven't died, just gone into hibernation. Heh. Little bear joke like in the good old days.
Mostly doing Twitter.

So I'm taking an online course through Ball State University, which on Twitter we are affectionately calling the #superMOOC. It's about Gender Through Comic Books. Lots of fun. One assignment was to draw our own comic based on experience we had that had something to do with gender. This is my (terrrible) comic based on my hitch-hiking adventures back in the day. A few caveats:
I can't draw. Yes, and water is wet.
This is a true experience, though the dialogue is only as best as I can recall after more than fifteen years.
I don't look like that, nor did I have a magic baseball cap. I just had a really smelly one.
I don't offer any answers, really. This is just a thing that happened.
And my scanner doesn't work so these are photos.
Anyways. Here you go:

Naia had a febrile seizure last night. Febrile seizures are a fairly common thing that happens to about 1 in 25 infants and isn't really a problem. Usually caused by a fever combined with a developing brain just causing a mild brain short circuit.  This is the kind of thing they need to make PSAs about, you know? Because I never heard of febrile seizures prior to last night, and it took a house full of firemen and paramedics to educate me.
We heard her start doing this very strange noise, kind of a stuttery moaning which was plainly not normal. In fact my first thought was seizure since I have some experience with that (not myself. Long story.) Michelle was the first to grab her and she was shaking for a few seconds, and her eyes were rolling in her head. She threw up a bit later. We called 911 and the excellent first responders of Edmonton came very quickly. They packed her up and took her in the ambulance to the Stollery. I followed a bit later when our neighbour came over to keep an eye on Pallas for us.
We were there till almost 4AM, and by the time the doctors saw her she was running and jumping and her usual cheery self. A nurse had given her a popsicle earlier so she tried scamming another one from the doctor. Anyways they weren't too concerned about it, all very common to them. And today Naia seems fine. I was supposed to be working nightshift starting tonight but I stayed home an extra night to keep an eye on everyone. Some serious lack of sleep going around the house today.
But it's all good.

The funny thing is, I didn't even coach her to do this. She just thinks it's really really really funny all on her own. Final proof of nature vs nurture, I guess.

  

Perhaps you heard that The Clone Wars is ending after five seasons. Originally I seem to recall it was slated for three with a slim shot of making it to five, so I guess we can't really complain. Still, a little sad. I'm still working my way through the Season 4 blu-rays, and Pallas and I have lots of watching ahead of us- she loves the feature film (technically it was 3 episodes strung together and released in theatres) and I haven't even really showed her that there are like a hundred other episodes! I've said it many times, The Clone Wars is the best animated show on television, and is the best thing about the whole prequel era.
Here's a really sweet farewell letter from the voice of Obi-wan Kenobi, James Arnold Taylor.

A week ago or so Marvel started teasing this image, which caused quite a bit of speculation as to what it was, exactly. The Marvel Now line has been rolling out for a few months and has been pretty much hugely successful. So what was this #1? A new series? Unlikely given the huge number of creators listed. An omnibus collection of all the Now #1s? Maybe, yeah, but that's not anything new and all us diehard fans would have all that material anyway. And so on.
Yesterday was the big announcement, and it turned out to be a huge, really huge, digital giveaway of 700 Marvel comics, all first issues of series from the original Marvel comic, Fantastic Four right up to quite a few of the Now titles. 700. Anyone with an account with either the Marvel store or the linked Comixology store could get them. Within minutes pretty much everyone jumped on to redeem, causing the servers to crash.
Comixology spent all day working on the situation, and had their Twitter account suspended for too many tweets as they assured fans and customers personally that they would fix the issues. A few people were disgruntled but mostly everyone was like, "Hey, they're trying to give us free comics for no reason other than that they're cool, so we're good." As of now the giveaway has been suspended while they fix it up. Originally it was only supposed to be until tomorrow but sounds like they'll extend it to serve everyone. Glitches happen, but ultimately I think this will be a win for Marvel, for Comixology and comic book readers in general.
One guy definitely lost, though, and I feel bad for him. I don't know any details so I won't speculate, but I do know that Ruwan Jayatilleke, who was the Marvel VP of digital publishing or somesuch, was let go by Marvel last week. As far as I know, this whole thing was his baby. Again, I know no details but I do know Ruwan was an amazing guy on Twitter, interacting with fans as a fan, and not as some corporate suit who had to stay on message. He gave away digital codes for comics all the time and built up a pretty large following. He wiped his Twitter account but didn't delete his account so hopefully he'll pop up sometime with new opportunities for himself. If you're out there, Ruwan, thank you for all you did.

There's this cool exhibit in Edmonton right now. It closes April 1st so I finally got around to taking Pallas to it today. Star Wars Identities. It's an interactive thing where you create your Star Wars identity, persona, alter-ego, what have you. Plus tons of models and concept art and costumes from the movies. So it was pretty sweet. They project your characters on a screen at the end, and then email you the high-res image along with a character bio based on the things you answered and entered. From Pallas' bio:

I remember this one time when I was attacked by a wampa and badly injured. This had a pretty big influence on me, I guess, because after that I founded a support group for victims of wampa attacks.

I remember what I was going to say now! Sometimes you flag something in your head for a blog post and then forget all about it. But I read this:

I love concept art and this was packaged really nicely- kind of a fake leathery tome look. It even has Thorin's map inside complete with glow-in-the-dark moon runes! And the contract Bilbo signs in the back. And lots and lots of pictures of dwarves! Dwarfs. However Tolkien spelled a plurality of dwarven people.
Best part- there's a couple of pages devoted to something called the High Fells, a tomb where men of old had buried the corpses of the Nazgûl when their mortal bodies died. An inaccessible and forbidding place, and Gandalf and Radagast go there in search of, well, answers. Everyone's searching for answers, right? Though if I was Gandalf I would've brought Bilbo and Smaug with me rather than Radagast. Little Sherlock humour there, never mind me.
A little hint at something to look forward to in The Desolation of Smaug, anyway. The High Fells, I mean, not Sherlock humour.

Took Pallas to the Symphony today. It wasn't her first, actually. Long time ago Michelle and I took her to a free lunch concert. I think she was a little over a year? Anyways. This is the first she'll (hopefully) remember. It was a good one to pick as they projected scenes from BBC's Blue Planet while the orchestra played the soundtrack. Senator Tommy Banks narrated!
Pallas did pretty good- she was definitely engaged for the first half. She asked tons of questions about the animals, and said "Wow" under her breath a few times. Because the screen was so prominent, I'm not sure she really got that it was the music that was the main attraction. Oh well. We had to duck out a bit early to go to the washroom (false alarm, actually) and then she didn't quite make it to the end of the second half, and she wanted to leave early. Still, glad we went.

Two oaths, three Bibles. As a Canadian I think I understand the hows and the whys. Martin Luther King, Jr., yeah? And Abraham Lincoln. Very cool. And a family Bible for a private oath. Perhaps in the far future, some President-Elect will want to use the Obama family Bible for her oath. Eventually, maybe, a Yertle the Turtle-like stack of Bibles will be the norm, and the reason this won’t be silly is because these Bibles, mere books in and of themselves, take on talismanic significance when used in oaths of office.

A culture needs its talismans.

Clay goddess figurines in the Paleolithic. The aquila of Rome. The Star of David. Martin Luther King Jr.’s Bible.

I’m Canadian. So I have . . . the easy answer would be the Stanley Cup and Tim Horton’s donuts, but honestly, there’s so much more to being Canadian than that. Just don’t ask me to define what, exactly. We’re not very good at that. And anyway, it’s probably more accurate to say the culture to which I most strongly adhere is pop culture.

Pop culture is rife with talismans. Rife. People wear replica One Rings and Mockingjay pins and Boba Fett hoodies. Not to mention tattoos. I once went to New Zealand with a friend and in our little fellowship there may have been a plastic One Ring. And it’s possible we got matching Nazgûl tattoos while we were there. Maybe.

These types of talismans are identifiers. By wearing them we are signaling to others in our tribe that we are one of them. Like a secret handshake. There’s another type of talisman that I call Totems of Power. Hah, no I’m messing with you. I don’t really call them anything. But for lack of anything else to call them...

I’m talking about mental constructs that can be used to empower. Strengthen. Encourage. They make you better. The ones that serve me best in life are those that help me face fear. I’m a grown man with kids and I’m certainly not afraid of the dark, but there is fear and anxiety in my life, and I’m sure you can relate. I’m a little scared just typing those words, to be honest.

There’s that scene in Peter Jackson’s The Return of the King where King Théoden is giving the obligatory rousing speech to his troops before sending them madly into battle. He says something about a red dawn. The part that always get me is when Éowyn and the hobbit Merry, though they are visibly terrified, thrust their blades into the air, loose a howling battle-cry and charge. They’re scared but they do it anyway.

In the Green Lantern story arc The Sinestro Corps War, Geoff Johns has arch-enemy Sinestro, whose Corps exist to spread fear throughout the universe, taunting Hal Jordan. “You’ll never be without fear, Jordan.” Hal responds by saying that Green Lanterns aren’t without fear- a Green Lantern overcomes fear. Every time they face it. And then he punches Sinestro in the face. Pow. I think of that and it becomes easier to venture out to get groceries in a crazy snowstorm. 

Angry? I silently scream “Serenity now!” along with Jerry Stiller. And remind myself where all of the Hulk’s incredible rage got him in Greg Pak’s opus Planet Hulk (spoiler alert- nothing good). Or I sing Metallica’s St. Anger to myself. It helps.  

There are so many more. Mine skew heavily towards comics and early 90’s death metal. Yours might draw more from romantic comedies or Star Trek. Maybe Buffy. 

I’d be glad to hear what yours are. I wonder if one of the President’s talismans is Yertle the Turtle. It certainly has life lessons any head of state would do well to heed.

Today was the ten year anniversary of the loss of the space shuttle Columbia with all hands. Already a decade, wow. Hmm.
I was 12 when the Challenger was lost. I remember it vividly. I was telling Michelle today that a joke made the rounds shortly after that disaster. I thought it was so funny. "What does NASA stand for?"
"Need Another Seven Astronauts."
I went running up to my dad when I got home to share this super-clever joke with him. I was so sure he would laugh and congratulate me on my wit, even though it was merely wit-by-association.
He did not laugh.
He tore right into me, and though I can't now transcribe his exact words, they were to the effect of: what the hell is the matter with you? Seven people died and you make a joke about it? Are you sure you're my son?
Coming from my dad it was so jarring, so embarrassing and so true. He was right. And I never forgot it.  It's too bad such a valuable life lesson came out of such a horrific tragedy.
You always think everyone else gets the same lessons you do, but they don't. Some people have dads who told them that joke, or ones like it. No wonder there's still so much assholery out there.
Don't be insensitive. Be nice. So simple. Easy, too, with enough practice.

The crew of the space shuttle Challenger, which disentegrated mid-flight on January 26, 1986:

Francis R. (Dick) Scobee
Michael J. Smith
Judith A. Resnik
Ronald E. McNair
Ellison S. Onizuka
Gregory B. Jarvis
Sharon Christa McAuliffe

The crew of the space shuttle Columbia, which disintegrated mid-flight on February 1, 2003:

Rick D. Husband
William C. McCool
Michael P. Anderson
Ilan Ramon
Kalpana Chawla
David M. Brown
Laurel Blair Salton Clark

There are a few power couples in comics, and they are all my favourites. But today my supafave is definitely Kelly Sue DeConnick and her husband Matt Fraction. Kelly Sue writes the new Captain Marvel series which I love. Rumour is that it might be on the chopping block, which would be a real shame. Don't let it happen, Marvel! She also writes Avengers Assemble and has a creator-owned book called Pretty Deadly coming out later this year which is being drawn by Emma Rios which looks pretty great, judging by this teaser image posted by Emma on her Flickr:



Matt Fraction writes a bunch of stuff, all of which I like, but his best current book is definitely Hawkeye. You know, from the Avengers. This series is about what Clint Barton does when he's not Avenging. So he's rarely, if ever, in uniform. He shoots some arrows now and then but he also has barbecues with his neighbours who think his name is Hawkguy. It's consistently hilarious and innovative. The art is pretty great too.

Hawkeye #7 came out yesterday, and it was the issue that Matt Fraction promised to donate some of the proceeds from to the Red Cross for Hurricane Sandy relief. One thing led to another and pretty soon this was happening. It turned into this whole thing and over a hundred people donated to the Red Cross in the name of Hawkguy. Homie Bear might have, as well, under his secret identity. He had to make up an American address to get the form to work which is why Nathanliesaboutlivingonboats. It's a whole thing.
Anyways. Love them. Love their work. You should support it! Here's some free digital codes for Marvel comics written by them to get you started, go to https://marvel.com/redeem/ to redeem. Neither Captain Marvel nor Hawkeye come with digital codes, unfortunately. Only works once so first come first served:

Avengers Assemble #9 by Kelly Sue: TMM54NTRX288
Avenging Spider-man #9 (featuring Captain Marvel): MTML18TYTYVA
The MIghty Thor #15 by Matt: ATMC1NB5A9PB
The Mighty Thor #19: MTML4XF9HYK2
The MIghty Thor #20: MTML141USR2V

I think the biggest problem with The Dark Knight Rises is it was a comic book movie. "Of course it was a comic book movie, it's Batman!" The thing is, neither Batman Begins nor the Dark Knight were comic book movies. Not really. As a comic book movie, DKR isn't so bad. "There's a guy who wears a mask because, you know, it hurts if he doesn't, and he beats up Batman and takes over Gotham City." There's at least 300 Batman comic books with that exact same premise, add or subtract a mask or two.  Batman then has to overcome great odds to take back Gotham, with or without the aid of Catwoman. Done and done!
But yeah, it was kind of a mess. A breathtaking mess in parts. But a mess.

A few Free Comic Book Days ago I was at Happy Harbor Comics and for the price of a donation to the food bank I got a very cool Star Wars drawing by Calgarian artist Fiona Staples:



Right now Fiona is arguably the biggest artist in comics, with her and Brian K. Vaughan's series Saga making pretty much every single best-of list in the comics world. With the Oscar nominations coming out right away I expect they'll get a nod for Best Pictures. Because the pictures (and the story) in Saga are the best! Seriously I love this comic. It's gorgeous, funny, warm and so so bizarre. The hard part is thinking of something new to say about it that hasn't already been said by everyone from NPR to the New York Times.

It's your basic tale narrated by the baby of a pair of star-crossed lovers, who are chased by tv-screen-headed robots and freelance bounty hunters such as The Stalk, a sexy arachnoid creature. I'm pretty sure I have never before written the words sexy and arachnoid and creature together in a sentence. Oh yeah and their babysitter is the ghost of a dead teenager. The upper half of her, anyway. The first trade paperback is available now, and as a bonus, Comixology is giving away the digital issue #1 for free today only! So go! Go now! Hurry! (For mature readers, yo.)










Special bonus Fiona Star Wars pic, I got this one from her at Calgary Comics and Entertainment Expo: