And just to make it clear, this is the second entry by gabrielle, so all brilliance is hers:

Homie Bear settled onto the couch at precisely 10:00 am. It was a Tuesday morning, bright and crisp outside the patio windows. He picked up the phone receiver and dialed in to his daily conference call. There was a pause and a series of odd clicks so routine that Homie Bear never really paid them much attention. The operator’s voice told him in quiet tones that he was about to enter a conference call and would he state his name? “Homie Bear,” he said firmly into the receiver. He was announced and the call began…

Homie Bear: Good morning all.
Dalai Lama: Good morning.
King Snowfrost: Seems we’re missing somebody yet.
Homie: Marilyn?

(as though on cue there is a series of static crackles and then Marilyn Manson is announced by the ever-calm operator)

Snowfrost: Right on time.
Marilyn Manson: Late is a state of mind. I choose to think of myself as early for tomorrow’s call.
Homie: Same old Marilyn.
Marilyn: How did the Oilers game go last night, Homie?
Homie: We won in overtime! It was incredible. How was your show?
Marilyn: Sacrificed a goat on the drum set, tossed my genitals into the crowd, deflowered a virgin. The
usual routine. The bass was unleashed. ‘Ka-boom’ sounded frenetic. Good night.
DLama: The press persists in printing such unfounded lies about you, Brian. Doesn’t that bother you?
Marilyn: Part and parcel, Holiness. I seek out the unfounded. It keeps people questioning and questions
are better than complacency.
DLama: You have a spiritual journey not marked for most, it’s true.
Marilyn: There can only be one Antichrist.
Snowfrost: So you claim repeatedly. I have yet to see proof of your status.
Marilyn: The proof will come in the end times, my polar friend.
Homie: I think you’re more of a scholar than you care to admit, Marilyn. You’re a humanities
expert of sorts.
Snowfrost: Always wisdom from the bears. Remember that.

(there is the sound of rhythmic drumming over the line and somebody’s connection gives off the sound of being moved)

Homie: Good beat. Ginger?
Marilyn: Fuelled by a hangover. What’s on the agenda for today?
Snowfrost: Tourism to Churchill is down from last year.
Marilyn: That’s the agenda?
DLama: Global community is the agenda.
Homie: Speaking of bears…
Snowfrost: Hear hear!
Homie: … my roommate made an interesting point about tigers on her blog the other day.
DLama: Roy is not following the path of higher learning.
Marilyn: Karma will fucking nail you. It’ll go for the jugular.
Homie: Not about Roy, actually. About the fact that the white tigers in zoos and, yes, in the Mirage, are
actually inbred specifically to show off. Wild tigers are all orange and black. White ones are a
freak occurrence. I thought you’d like that, Marilyn.
Marilyn: ‘You’re one of us, one of us…’

(there is the sound of voices over somebody’s connection and a lot of static-y shuffling)

Snowfrost: Tigers are in some serious danger.
Homie: Indeed. There are less than 3000 in the wild today, according to my roommate.
DLama: Our treatment of animals depicts something of our opinion of ourselves.

Marilyn: I don’t actually sacrifice goats onstage.
Homie: Is that guilt speaking in the great Marilyn Manson?
Marilyn: Don’t be insulting, Homie. It’s statement of fact.
DLama: We here know your true nature, Brian. We aren’t swayed by media reports.
Snowfrost: Unless it involves Chinese astronauts.
DLama: (sighs) It should have involved us.
Homie: I’m not much of a rocket scientist.
DLama: I refer to my monks. It would then have been a day of rejoicing.
Marilyn: If the astronaut had died, they’d have found a way to blame Tibet. I’d say this way is better than
not.
DLama: One could almost suspect you of sympathizing, Brian.
Snowfrost: When will you do a benefit for the bears, friend musician?
Marilyn: When hell freezes over.
Snowfrost: (growls) Do I take that to be a deliberate slight?
Homie: I think he meant it’ll take a few years to organize. The Eagles said the same thing and it all
worked out in the end.
Marilyn: Ever the diplomat.

(there is the sound of distant chanting over somebody’s connection in the lengthy pause that follows)

Homie: It might snow later.
Snowfrost: Consider it a gift.
Marilyn: Will this affect eastern Canada as well?
Snowfrost: (with the hint of a growl) If I can be sure I’ll get you in the windchill, yes.
Marilyn: (low laughter)
DLama: He does love to rile you, Snowfrost.
Snowfrost: I can understand why the Mexicans protested his presence in their country.
Homie: Well they protest largely out of ignorance, I think. They have a knee-jerk reaction to what they
think Marilyn stands for and they get offended by him without really even listening to his music.
DLama: The most understood quite often have the most to teach us.
Marilyn: Example: Hitler.

(there is a roar of protest from Snowfrost and quiet laughter from Marilyn)

Snowfrost: Holiness, will you stand for such talk?
DLama: He is as entitled to his opinions as you to yours.
Homie: Actually he’s right, Snowfrost. Hitler did have a lot to teach us. Marilyn didn’t say it was a good
example or a moral lesson, per se. He just implied we could learn a lot from Hitler. Which,
hopefully, we can so we can avoid his sort of racial genocide in the future.
Snowfrost: Not just racial genocide. Species genocide.
Homie: Like the tigers.
Marilyn: I wonder if anyone else has such light Tuesday morning discussions?
Homie: Light would be the ‘Sleeping Beauty’ DVD I watched last night.

(there is the sound of a groan likely from Marilyn)

Snowfrost: You would imagine Disney would contribute more to the preservation of the animals they so
readily exploit in their movies.
DLama: Do what you can. Let others take care of theirs.
Homie: There’s a game on the DVD where you can answer a series of questions and the fairy will tell you
which Disney princess you’re most like.
Marilyn: (amused) Which princess are you?
Homie: Well my roommate is Ariel, apparently.
Marilyn: … and?
Homie: And you’re most like Cinderella.

(there is a snort of laughter from Snowfrost and a suspicious silence from the Dalai Lama)

Marilyn: I’m actually speechless. How do you figure that?
Homie: We answered the questions channeling you. We picked things we figured you’d like. And it turns
out you’re Cinderella.
Snowfrost: I never thought you were the mice and glass slipper type, Marilyn.
Marilyn: There’s obviously a lot of unexplored territory in me.
Homie: I can see a new album theme coming out of this. And you wouldn’t even have to change your
concert opening from ‘Night on Bald Mountain’.

(there is more laughter from Snowfrost and the simultaneous sound of a voice over somebody’s line)

Marilyn: Shame really, but I have an interview to get to.
Snowfrost: And I do have a council to attend.
DLama: Until tomorrow, peace be yours.
Homie: Same time tomorrow. Bye everyone.

Homie Bear hung up the phone with a slight smile. Then he stood and stretched before putting on his shoes and heading off into the autumn sun for an afternoon of research in the university library.